I feel at ease, I feel at home, and I know I'm not alone.
Then in my rest, there comes a test that shakes me till again I know
that what I had is not enough, and again I've got to grow.
that what I had is not enough, and again I've got to grow.
Lord, I want to know You more.
Deep within my heart I want to know You.
Lord I want to know You,
and I would give my final breath to know You in your death &ressurection.
Lord I want to know You,
and I would give my final breath to know You in your death &ressurection.
Lord I want to know You more..
Lord I want to know You more.
Lord I want to know You more.
--
I want to know You more so that I could maybe understand even just a little bit of why You put so much suffering upon good people who love You. Sometimes I want to curse at You and give up because it doesn't make sense to me that the more we try to seek You, the more You try to test us. I feel so weak lately, I don't know how much I have left in me to keeping holding on, to keep trusting. I pray and pray and pray, yet these prayers still feel so abandoned and sometimes I feel like I'm talking to no one.. My family doesn't deserve this. My mother, of all people, doesn't deserve this. All she does is give to her family, give to her church, give to others, and she gets nothing back in return. My best friend's dad is terminally ill with cancer, and as if that hasn't taken enough toll on my friend's spiritual life, he just finds out that his mom has cancer as well. Frankly, I don't blame him for jumping off his spiritual wagon. Is it wrong for them to ask for a little break?? I really want to give up these days. I thought I had bad days before, but I always stuck it through and found strength in the Lord. But now I feel like I'm at my wits end, and I don't know how much I can endure any longer.